It’s funny how sometimes in your darkest moments, you find that one thing that pulls you up to your feet, and that thing sometimes becomes your passion and your “saving grace”. For me, that thing is music. I think it was probably eighth grade when music really became everything to me. I remember one day in first period, my friend asked me if I had ever heard of the band All Time Low? Sad to say but, at that point in time, I hadn’t heard of them. Anyway, thank you Cecilia for introducing me to them because they opened my eyes to alternative music. When I listen to music, I pay more attention to the lyrics than anything else. Every time my mom and I are listening to a song and she turns to me and asks “What was that song even about?”, I always tell that she’s not really listening to the song, she’s just hearing it. I don’t think she fully understands what I mean and it’s hard to explain. When I’m listening to music, I can feel it spreading to every cell in my body. I can feel it pulsing through my veins, flowing to every extremity until my whole body is vibrating. I don’t know why music makes me feel like this and I don’t know why I crave it like an addict craves their next high. Maybe it’s because it is one of the few things that makes me feel alive anymore. All that I know is that music is the only thing that hasn’t disappointed me. When I feel like the water’s current is finally dragging me down, I hear music blaring and it gives me just enough energy to kick myself up to surface. Not a lot of people know this but, if I’m still here in the future, I would love to be a big songwriter. Obviously, I dream about being on stage singing my own lyrics, listening as people sing them back to me but, that’s never going to happen, so maybe I can watch someone else sing my song and be content with knowing that even though it’s not my voice, it is my words and it is my message.
My dear niece, how totally special you are without knowing it. You are a teacher for the soul. You have been many times for me during my ups and downs. I take pride knowing that the same blood flows through our veins.I learn from you Jessi, in many ways you are the master and we are all your students. Thank-you for that. Thank-you for being in our lives, for sharing your life with those of us that often take every moment for granted. Life isn’t easy, we have to make the best of it which can be daunting. But know that you are loved, and by so many. Be that songwriter honey, let the world hear your voice! I love you.